I feel sick

Sick at the thought of being ok

Nauseous at my friends wanting me

Eight months of isolation

Screeching to a halt

And now I’m moving too fast

Speed used to rule me

Used to be the way I lived

But now I crave stillness

I was a whirlwind

Of joy and pain and change

Of life and breath

But since then

I was forced to stop

And I fear things are picking up again

I fear a return to happiness

A reinstatement to my palace

A rise from the depths to my throne

My head spins

At the thought of normality

To rule my life again

But I must push through the sickness

Eat through the nausea

Climb to the mountaintops

I was never meant for the bottom

Never meant to stop

If I stay-

Stillness will be the death of me.


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